I went to the university-wide commencement ceremony tonight – it felt all official and everything. Graduation! Here are some of my blow-by-blow impressions of the night’s events, to be continued tomorrow when I’m a little more awake.
Aisle seat! I am THE MASTER OF THE ROW. Or at least the person everybody has to squeeze past to get to the middle seats. Close enough!
It’s pretty cool to have a near-full moon hovering over your graduation ceremony. And only two nights away from the super moon, at that.
The guy two seats in front of me has a gown that is about two shades lighter than the other 9,999 of us. I applaud him for both his resourcefulness (reusing an old gown) and the bold fashion statement.
Random beach ball! It pops up from a different section, falls down and then mysteriously vanishes.
Many of the students seated with the Herberger Institute for Design and the Arts have decorated caps…but it looks like most of them have decorated them upside down. So much for those degrees…
All of the special people begin to walk in. Hello, special people.
Hey, there’s someone I know – Dr. Foy, from the Barrett Honors College. Thanks for the last A+ of my college career, Dr. Foy!
In the middle of the ceremony, one of the students gets up and walks the length of the football field back to the north entrance. Perhaps, like me, he is sick of how utterly uncomfortable the folding chairs are. Where are the graduates studying to be chiropractors?
President Crow appears, to widespread boos from the student section. In his current garb, I think he would make an excellent supervillain. He just needs an actual evil crow to sit on his shoulder and he’s set.
Speaker: Now it is time to award the honorary degree to a distinguished guest. “It’s me,” announces the guy who left earlier, as he walks back to the front and his seat.
Chairman Lim, honorary degree recipient, is nearly strangled with his stole by the person putting it on him. Academic attire can be hazardous to your health, apparently.
Temple Grandin, second honorary degree recipient, gets much more applause. Judging by the buzzing conversations around me, about half of the students know who she is and are informing the other half.
Eric Kandel, third honorary degree recipient, is pretty dang cool. His biography is interesting even when told by the mindless drone reading it out in a monotone. His stole-bestower nearly gags him with the thing. I make up my mind to never receive any honor for which I am forcibly stoled by a stranger.
…To be continued tomorrow!